The Let's Play Archive

Hyperdimension Neptunia

by Feinne

Part 47: Vert

Last time on Hyperdimension Neptunia, I decided to join up with Neptune to save the world. Now, on Hyperdimension Neptunia!

Video- “Vert Scenes”


The Sanctified:
No answer… She’s basically a corpse.
Hmhmhmm… I won’t stand for this insolence any longer. It’s time to prepare for war. War, I say!
The Sanctified: L-Lady Green Heart?!
We shall instigate an all-out attack on those Planeptune fools. Of course, I shall take the lead.
So, please gather those with good tanking and aggro capabilities by tonight… There.
The Sanctified: Y-Yes, my Lady!
…I never expected the calm, reserved Lady Green Heart to rally the troops for battle.
I thought she only had brains for games and anime. She’s a true goddess, after all.
She’s been governing the land carefully, under the guise of playing games.
…I should try to emulate her.
Lady Green Heart, your army is ready.
With your command, we are ready to charge!
Oh, shush. What in the world is going on here?
The Sanctified: My Lady, I have come to report we are ready to assault Planeptune!
…Huh? Why would we desire such a thing?
The Sanctified: Why…? That’s what you told us to organize this morning, my Lady.
…This morning? Ohhhh… I think I understand the situation.
I was playing an MMO this morning, silly.
The Sanctified: …Huh?
The Planeptune players are getting too rowdy. They think they should get all the drops since the game’s made in their land.
So, players from other lands have been plotting a coup to teach them a lesson.
The Sanctified: I was certain you were talking about real life… Then, what should I do with the assembled army…?
The Sanctified: Damn…

That’s not how I remember last time.

Everything. Rhythm games, fighting games, shooting games, crane games, racing games…
I play medal games, too. The arcade actually keeps my coins in storage there.
The Sanctified: You really do play the field, huh? Do you have a favorite?
Well… I’ve recently gotten a soft spot for simulation games.
There’s one where I sit inside a car-shaped booth and shoot giant mutant creatures…
Or one where I sit inside a pod-shaped chair and control a giant robot to fight in battle with.
Oh, and I’ve become a pro at the crane games. I’ve gotten so I can win prizes at least once per trip.
The Sanctified: Whoa, impressive. I’ve never seen an arcade in Leanbox with such a variety of games.
Nope. Planeptune has them everywhere.
The Sanctified: …What?!
That said, I’ll return tomorrow night. Thanks for always letting me slip out.
The Sanctified: Yes, my La-… Wait, what?!
I hope I’ll just get scolded and nothing worse…

Yeah I’m pretty sure I had to beat you up and then we sorta kidnapped you after.

…Y-Yes, may I help you, dear Nisa?
They’re… ginormous.
…My breasts?
How can I make mine plump up like yours?
When did they start to blossom and grow for you, my Lady?
Well, I think I was just born with them.
We’re a bit different from normal humans. Understand?
…Oh, actually, I may have an idea why.
What? Really?!
Hmhmhmm, but I won’t tell you for free.
Let’s see… If you play games with me for a week, I’ll consider sharing my secret.
I just have to play games for a week?!
Sure. There’s a Guild Raid in one week online to decide who’s the top Guild.
Of course, mine will participate, but not everyone can play since they’re busy with their real lives. Quitters.
I want you to raise a character who’ll be the top tank for my Guild.
…You’re telling me to become an addict?
Why yes, that’s what it’ll take.
…I’ll humbly decline that offer.

I guess if you want to get all technical on things it could have looked like that.

You’re either working or drinking too much.
I’m fine. I played the MMO a bit too much and forgot to take a breath. I’m so hot…
You’re one of the CPUs, too… How long did you end up playing?
Only about five hours yesterday. Sometimes I’ll play around 150 hours per week.
150 hours?! You’re not even sleeping for 2 hours each day!
I’m still an amateur. A trained MMO veteran would play non-stop without sleep.
Just out of curiosity… What do you do about meals?
I stockpile a week’s worth of food in my room.
Wouldn’t you gain weight? I think you should stop…
Actually, no matter my eating habits, I don’t gain an ounce. I wonder if it’s because I’m a CPU?
…I’m tremendously jealous.

But I prefer to look at things positively.

The fan-exclusive collector’s set: Kichiku Megane Harlem Set for Virgins!
Comes with the game disc, drama CD, art book, and series anthology… Oh, I can’t wait!
Since I’m one of the first ten members, I get the VIP treatment!
A special alarm clock with one of the actor’s voices recorded to call my name.
My day would be that much better, getting to hear such a handsome voice in the morning.
Awww, isn’t it here yet?
Lady Green Heart, you have package.
Oh, little Gust. Did you deliver this for me?
I’m registered under emergency contact as temporary delivery staff, so I do this sometimes.
I was asked to deliver package to you.
Content description is ‘Kichiku Megane Harlem Set for Virgins.’ Yes?

…Lady Green Heart?
Little Gust… Please don’t tell anyone about this!
Especially Iffy! Anyone but her…!
She will be so disappointed in me if she learns I purchased an Adult Only rated all-male item…
I wouldn’t be able to live with myself…
Then give hush money.
You’re goddess, so I discount to 10% of package cost. Then, secret safe.
Ugh… I can’t believe I’m being taken advantage of…
But it’s a small price to pay if this prevents Iffy from being disappointed in me.
This called easy money.

Wait, you bought what now?

Oh? Whatever could it be?
I got free voucher code for Planeptune’s MMO, Four Goddesses Online.
Are you serious?!
I didn’t win that, even though I applied two-hunderd times…
Well, one application per address…
I changed the name and address each time… How did they know?
I’ll sell it at good price if you want.
You will?! That’s fantastic.
How about ten thousand?
T-Ten thousand…?!
…Too expensive for goddess, huh? I guess it silly to expect someone to agree to pay so much…
Such a bargain! Sold!

I don’t know what you’re talking about I certainly wouldn’t buy any games with inappropriate content or even know that the game we’re talking about has such content.

Ahhh… I’ve stayed up all night writing songs, but never playing a board game…
It’s harder than I thought, staying up and doing things I’m not used to.
IF was completely zoned out after the 50th turn…
…Hopefully it doesn’t happen the next time we play.
In any case, earning 100 million in 2 years is just abnormal.
I was cursed with bad money luck the whole time, so I never got out of the red…
Madam Boxgreen is a harsh mistress…

And anyway I’m an adult, so who cares if I want to buy an Adults Only game?

I’ve never played an online game… I don’t know what I’m supposed to do after I log on…
What do I say when someone talks to me? Where am I supposed to go?
I know I’m supposed to meet her here… I wonder if Lady Green Heart will find me?
Oh! ‘Lyrica? Were you waiting long? I’m sorry.’ It’s Lady Green Heart!
Hmm… ‘I hope you’ll be able to help me out today…’ There.
She’s using a male character… It’s online, so I guess she can do whatever she wants.
I wouldn’t have ever noticed if her character weren’t named ‘xXGreenHeartXx.’
Huh? What’s she doing behind that thingy?
Whoa! Lots of potatoes and lemons! ‘Lemons are valuable, so you should collect them while you can?’
Lady Green Heart… She’s so nice, even online… Huh? Guild Raid? …I have no idea what that is.

She invited me to something called a Guild Raid, which is supposed to happen in three days…
Oh well. I’ll sign back on around then!
You should really think it over…

Also you pretend to be a guy online?

What’re you talking about? What’d she agree to?
To marry me, of course!
Oh, was there like a ten minute rule or something?
It’s different. We already had a ceremony and everything.
A ceremony…? You’re surely not talking about a wedding, are you…?
Yeah, a wedding! What else? We got married!
Isn’t that too soon? And what happened to all that Wifey Number 1 crap? You just move from person to person?
Lady Green Heart’s a boy, though.
Nuh-uh! She’s got a really cool character on Four Goddesses Online!
Four Goddesses… Online?
Yup. We got married in the game!
O-Oh. You’re talking about a game. Good. I thought I was going to have a heart attack.
Lady Green Heart’s a real gentleman. She shares her stamina when I’m in danger and sends me rare equipment as gifts!
Uh-huh. That’s nice.
Where do you think we’ll go on our honeymoon? A tropical island in the shape of a heart, maybe?!
Right, heart-shaped island…
Lady Green Heart’s gonna wear a tux and I’ll be in a dress and we’ll have a sugary-sweet time together!
Talking about this stuff makes me miss her… I’m gonna go back to her room now!
Wha-… Hey! Wait…! …What’s up with that? She looks like she’s having fun, I guess.

That’s perfectly ordinary as well.

You’re in a good mood. Were you playing games with Lady Green Heart again?
Yup! She’s got so many!
I never, ever get bored in her room.
…So what kind of game did you play today?
A shooting game! She said it’s an FPS or something.
You hold this gun and shoot at bad guys!
…FPS? …Guns? Was there a lot of blood?
Oh yeah, buckets and buckets! Like a slimy, bloody hell!
Red, do you remember seeing a letter in a black and white box on the game’s package?
Like E, or T… It’s the game’s rating. Do you remember what it had?
It was an Eeeeem…
…I’m going to have a chat with Lady Green Heart.

I mean I really don’t see anything wrong with playing a character that isn’t your real gender, it’s just a game.

A present? Um, thanks. What’s the occasion?
I… I can’t tell you! It’s got nothing to do with me wanting to raise my Charisma level, just so you know.
…All right, thanks. I’ll just accept your kind thoughts. That’s all I need.
You’ve got to take the present, too! You’re way too mean!
I had such a hard time finding it! You like that one goddess, right?
R-Right. I mean, I respect them all for protecting entire landmasses on their own.
Meeting them in person really… changed how I see them.
Well, guess what?! You can match that one goddess with this item!
Ta-da! Kichiku Megane Harlem Set for Virgins!
Wh-What are you talking about?! Why would any goddess own such a thing?!
I’m not kidding. I found this in Lady Green Heart’s room one day.
I didn’t know where to get it, but I finally found a copy on the interweb thing. Here you go!

She must’ve seen something else and mistook it for this, just like the Blanc Manju debacle. Yup, yup.

A-anyway, Next Time on Hyperdimension Neptunia: CPU White Heart. Someone besides me can be embarrassed!