Part 52: Arfoire’s Secret Castle

Last time on Hyperdimension Neptunia, the path to Celestia was opened. Now on Hyperdimen-
Nobody cares, there are pressing matters to discuss, namely that it’s bullshit that Arfoire gets a secret castle in the heavens.
Yeah, it really stretches plausibility that we wouldn’t know about something like a huge awesome castle where we usually live.
I’m pretty sure readers lost their suspension of disbelief about fifty episodes ago, though.
I don’t have anything to add to this conversation but I feel like I should say something so pudding is delicious!

Video- “Celestia”

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I never knew a castle existed in Celestia.
You didn’t know? Maybe you were already Nep-Nep-ing even back when you were a goddess.
Celestia is… rather large and not nearly as clustered as the human world, so… I never knew of this place either.
Arfoire did not even tell any of you about this castle…?
Even then, the time we spent apart was far too long.
We should all spend some quality girly pillow-talk time once this has all concluded.
Sure, um… book. Neptune calls you Histy, so that’s fine, right?
How did you three meet one another?
You’re not all from Planeptune, right?
I took care of Nep-Nep when she fell from the sky. We bumped into Iffy in a dungeon shortly after that!
From the sky… Right. I really should apologize to Nep-Nep…
I’m so sorry. The other goddesses and I are the ones who led to your fall.
It was when… We were all impatient to just finish the stupid Console War…
We finally chose to eliminate one of us to start with. We, the other three, managed to defeat Neptune.

WHAT’S UP JERKTOWNS?!
Holy crap!



What?! Nuh-uh, no way! …Is something wrong with my memory again?
…I look up ot you two. I couldn’t imagine traveling with Neptune and not strangling her.
Yeah, it was pretty bad at first. She was still a total dunce like now, but add amnesia to that.
It’s like the birth of the ultimate moe cavewoman. Her aura of ignorance was just so suffocating.
I… I never emitted any stinky auras! Girls only emit rainbows and marshmallows!
…I bet you did. To make it worse, you’re naturally indifferent towads yourself.
Right. You’re so nosy about other people’s business, but you never really talked about yourself.
Th-That’s cuz I didn’t remember nothin’!
We’re relaxed here, but this might be the final dungeon. Isn’t this Arfoire’s home?
I do not believe so. I think this is merely used as a base of operations.
Then we might find her Evangelist costume, special weapons, and armors!
…Evangelist costume?
Enough chatter, girls. We should move. Arfoire will laugh at us if we continue to dilly-dally!

BLARG I AM SO POWERFUL, YOU CANNOT DEFEAT MY WALL OF STUPID WORDS!
I am suspicious that this Arfoire is some sort of elaborate fraud.
What was your first friggin’ clue?

Video- “Confrontation”

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How many times have we suffered that laugh? I’m glad we won’t have to anymore after this.
Sorry to interrupt, but… It’s been a while, Ms. Arfoire. Remember me? The goddess you tricked and manipulated?!
…I’ve no idea what you’re talking about! However, I do remember this one hopeless, arrogant goddess who…
…couldn’t do anything but watch Avenir practically take control of her own land!
Well, excuse me! I-It’s not like I’m the most efficient girl in the world…
But I’ve always done my very best! I’ve regretted a few things from my past, but I haven’t lost hope.
Yes. Sometimes, trying too hard can cause mistakes. Admitting that is the hardest part!
Thanks. I was able to finally realize that, too.
I wasted thousands of years fighting with the other goddesses, because of you. For that, I’ll make you pay!
Long time, no see. I have to thank you for something.
I would never have left my room if you didn’t come to my land and screw things up…
Hmph! What’s a sheltered, amateur goddess doing here? Gonna try to defeat me you fool?
You must not know what I’m capable of. Sounds like your brain grew mold while you overheated in your locked room.
Mold? They’re more like mushrooms, really…
…Green Heart?
I would never have made jokes like that before because I didn’t have any friends. But now, I have Iffy…!
Compa, too. And I guess… Nep-Nep. Arfoire, you gave me the opportunity to open my eyes and see the world.
Thanking you with all my heart isn’t enough to show my gratitude. I hope you can accept it.

I WILL DESTROY YOU WITH MY-
-this isn’t working, and this outfit is so sweaty. How does she fight in this?
I told you this plan was dumb.
Gust thinks plan was sound, failed in execution stage. IF and Compa’s fault.
I have to agree, if only that stupid costume fit me this would have gone fine.



We’ve met a lot in my Evangelist disguise. Don’t think I’ve forgotten your crass way of speaking.
If you’re going to cuss and throw a tantrum, do as you wish. However, you must realize that’s your true self!
Maybe you’re right, but I ain’t gonna let it get to me each time you rub it in my damn face!
I’m gonna stop holding my tongue just because I’m a goddess!
I’ll bitch at anyone I don’t like whenever I want, because those are my true feelings!
What’s the point of a frickin’ goddess if she’s quiet all the time? I ain’t ashamed. This is how I roll, dammit!
Staying true to herself… That’s Neptune’s real strength. You can’t drag me down anymore!
I won’t let you pull me down to your level!
Arfoire, I am neither enemy nor friend. You already know that, right?
Look within yourself. You are your greatest nemesis…!
…
You are doing all of this to change yourself.
Her enemy is herself? Is she gonna beat herself up? Does she want us to defeat her?
No, she is trying to destroy the world in an effort to gain herself!
That explanation really didn’t help…
…Haaaaah ha ha ha! So you’ve come to that conclusion as well, Histoire?
You’ve been at my side for millions of years and you finally caught on, huh? Hysterical!
She’s her own nemesis? Gain herself? What? What’s all this mean?

No, it was pretty stupid. I mean first, her hair is still… whatever color that is. Second, you didn’t open with that ridiculous laugh. And yet I think you still fooled at least two of us.
I-I wasn’t fooled. I even said she looked suspicious!
I was too busy marveling at what you must be like if this past bit has been you holding back to notice the inconsistencies in their effort, Blanc.



Huh? She’s the world’s everything and the world’s her everything?
Yes! It all comes back to those words.
What do you think will happen to Histy if Arfoire destroys the world?
…She’d disappear?
No, I would not disappear, but there is no doubt I would forfeit most of my existence.
I will lose most of my power to stand against Arfoire.
Oh, so Arfoire could do whatever she wants to Histy when she’s sleeping.
Could you be any more thick? It means Arfoire would be able to gain Histy’s power!
And have her way with the world! That’s her objective.
Hmm… close. Histoire, is your answer the same as theirs?
No. Perhaps your goal is to use my power, and…
Overwrite yourself as the complete being known as the True Goddess?
Haaaah ha ha ha! Excellent! I am most amused.
Looks like locking you away in the human world wasn’t a bad idea, after all. You’ve become rather wise for a little old thing.
However, you’re missing something quite important.
I’ll show you what it is in this battle. Now, Neptune! This is the last time I shall call out your name!

Also Compa out of nowhere with the explanation, all wise and stuff.
Hey! I get the feeling you’re making fun of me somehow!

Video- “Arfoire”

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Boss Battle: Arfoire
This is a lot like the Arfoire we fought with just Neptune, except she hits like a train. Seriously, she can take off like 2/3 of someone’s health in her turn no problem and Compa would probably die to that sort of attention. That said, she’s got no health so just blow her up.

Yeah Neptune, I don’t think you get to make fun of anyone. Ever.

Video- “Uncertainty”

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That aside, Arfoire is down for the count. Let’s get out of here!
Yeah. I have a bad feeling about this place. You think it’ll start falling or self-destruct?
This building is not as fragile as you think.
However, I do feel something awful approaching…!
I hope that wasn’t another one of her fake little counterparts. They were all over the human world, right?
I highly doubt it. Arfoire’s records should be deleted in the tome by now.
You say that in such a vague way. You ARE the tome, right? Can’t you, like flip through your pages and check for sure?
Well, I can do a search, but are you sure? It may take me about three days…
No, thanks.
It feels like Arfoire’s soul remains and is wandering around us, laughing…
S-Stop it! I ain’t afraid of no ghost… I hope physical attacks will still be effective against her!
I forgot my holy water, too. Y’know, you shouldn’t get so scared, Nep-Nep…
That wasn’t meant to be offensive, but… Maybe you actually are scared of ghosts? I didn’t know… That’s kind of cute.
O-Of course. I’m scared of a lotta stuff. Like carrots, eggplants, bell peppers…
Those are just your least favorite foods. And they’re all veggies! Bad girl!

Sorry, already stopped listening.



You better not be leaving them on your plate… Or it may come true…
… Whatever you’re all feeling, we’re not going to sit here until Arfoire revives, are we?
No way. I’d like us all to leave as soon as possible… but we’re all worried.
We’ve all got strong motives to fight her… Don’t you wanna make certain this is over?
…So we’re gonna sit here and contemplate something we can’t do anything about?
Besides, not everything is gonna be back to normal just because we defeated Arfoire.
…Monsters still exist. There are so many stupid, annoying things we have to do to fix our exhausted lands.
True. This is just the start of the fight for you goddesses…
…I wonder what Nep will do?
Everyone, we must get out of this place immediately. Hurry…!

BUM BUM BUM! Next Time on Hyperdimension Neptunia: The Final Final Battle!