Part 3: Our Puns Are Just Straight Fire

Update #3: Our Puns Are Just Straight Fire




Did you find a mouse?

Ratty viruses already?!



This was changed from hot cake in the original translation for OSS.

Um... OK.

...Sure? I don't really know why they had to change it to apple pie. Is this one of the translator localizations?

Nope, they changed this from the original JP script too. I'm confused, too.



Seriously? You cook and you don't have any way to stop cooking fires? The fuck? Where is your baking soda!? Your fire extinguisher!? Why are you so useless!?

Yes. Your kitchen should always include a fire extinguisher, or at the very least some way to stop a fire.




GEE.

No way! He seemed so trustworthy!



And the mother raises no objections about us getting closer to the fire of course.



First dungeon in the series. But, in terms of a Hero's Journey, this one is more incidental, so it isn't playing the title theme. That brings up another point of contention: the music. Instead of re-composing, they just sampled the original tracks. This is the original boss theme, and here is OSS's. I will say that it seems like the second video seems to exaggerate the echo effect, but it really does sound different.

Man. I really hate what they did to the music, huh. Especially those rising and falling keyboard slides in the remake. What the hell is that. Ugh. Bleugh. Thanks, I hate it. While the game has several Quality of Life improvements, this is inexcusable.



: WHO ARE WE? WE'RE THE OVEN CONTROL PROGRAMS! NO, WE'RE NOT VIRUSES!

OK, that's funny.

See, if the Progs were the ones telling the jokes from the Humor program, I'd laugh



And he tells us to get the IceBlock. Same as usual. Thawing network in an oven, yadda yadd- wait what.



Yet another one of these. I won't object since it's the first dungeon and players may not have picked up Shotgun * from the non-fixed datas. Also, every mystery data in a dungeon is fixed.

Keep in mind that the asterisk code didn't show up in original game. This is much less useful in the original game.



You actually don't run into viruses before this little moment. On that note, the development team made encounters a little less frequent in this re-release. Most of you will love that addition for sure.




Er, it's a little weird that the WWW leaves behind a data signature that could be identified. But I suppose Wily's egomania is showing through.

Gotta sign your code, man. Otherwise how else will people learn to fear the name of WWW?




Iconic!



It's just a single Mettaur. Yep. Tough WWW virus.

B O I

oh fuck whaddup, it's the most dangerous encounter in the game.



So, I get into another fight with GutsMan *, but there's a small change I want to show.




GutsMan's attack stops at the last virus it kills, and damage is now dealt immediately when you use it, and not after the chip finishes like in the original.

Oh nice! It's... a weird thing to change, but it speeds things up a little bit.



Poor Progs.

While I agree, you have the weirdest fondness for that emote.



Quick, someone console MissEchelon!




LOOK AT HOW USELESS THEY ARE. SEND HELP

PROG DOWN! I REPEAT, PROG DOWN!



A purple data...with no Unlockers required, and 400 Zenny

Sigh

Nope, there are no SubChips in this game.

For a second, I forgot what game this was, and was incredibly confused when you got 400 Zenny from locked data.



Yoink.



Dead Prog: 1



Eyyy. That signifies another round of chips that had their codes changed.

MiniBomb(BN1): C E J L P
MiniBomb(OSS): C E J L *
PanelOut1(BN1): B D G L S
PanelOut1(OSS): B G L S *
Recov30(BN1): A C E G L
Recov30(OSS): B C D L *
AreaGrab(BN1): A E L P S
AreaGrab(OSS): A E L S *
Invis(BN1): I J L O Q
Invis(OSS): I J L Q *

Notably, AreaGrab now expires after 3 turns.

That * code really makes Invis incredible in every folder, doesn't it.

General rule of thumb is that they dropped the most useless code and replaced it with the asterisk instead.



Helpfully, the thawing network for the Iceblock has a green tint.

It's green for good! And green for Prog!



You know, that fire that blocked us earlier.




Different from later games:

MegaMan got:
"IceBlock"!!




Let's go!

Yeah! I can't wait to go put out some electrical fires in the network and then put out real fires in real life. Because that's just how things work here in Battle Network.



Noob.

Fuckin' owned.



DO SOMETHING





Motherfucker just taunts us. Mr. Match was a straight-up asshole.

Stone-cold. Or maybe that's not particularly appropriate, given the circumstances? Regardless, without Megaman, all of Lan's chances just went up in smoke.




We almost let that slip by us if not for his evil grin.

No! It couldn't have been the slightly-ominous repair guy who was just here to fix the control panel! When could he have possibly slipped in a virus?



I think the implication is that he locked the doors, somehow.



Yeah, this. For some reason, the door is locked, and I initially called bullshit. But I suppose the lock program is implictly tied into whatever FireMan is doing.

I assume it's more along the lines of 'FireMan is controlling the panel and not letting anything in or out' which is what's keeping the oven on fire and the doors locked. It doesn't, however, explain why they can't just leave out the back.




Wat.

But it's a toy water gun.

War isn't a game, Giver!



I missed a screenshot, but yeah, Lan shoots the flames with the watergun. We put out an electrical fire (it's connected to the Internet, so I assume electrical) with water.

This doesn't cause anymore issues and somehow helps out MegaMan. Yes.

For those of you at home, never use water to put out a fire on the stove. Use baking soda or a fire extinguisher. And I'm just refusing to consider the implications of what Lan just did. It's... just how this world works, I guess.




Puzzle time.

This is gonna be a hard one!



No changes here. Just budget your iceblock usage across 2 areas.



Pathetic.

Money's money... But yeah, this is chump change. Which makes it perfect for you, Giver.



So just go all the way over to the left side.



DJ Khaled: And anotha one.



A green gives 500 Zenny, while a Blue gave 200. Why do you guys bother with mystery data colors in this game? Why didn't the developers change this to be more consistent with the rest of the series? Seriously.

It just feels weird to have Blues be equal to Green, since BN2 was my first Battle Network game.



So, this purple gives us a strong chip for this area. Which, is what I thought they were going with for the purple, blue and green. But the last purple data gave 400 Zennys in the last area, so



It's not bad despite nothing matching its letter. Hits hard and can kill anything we run into.

It's our first vertical attack aside from WideSword, and this one can hit at range. And like Giver said, it's powerful for this early in the game, so why not put it in? Especially now that * chips exist.



Dead Prog: 2

Truly, the worst part of any combat is what happens to the innocents caught up in the fighting



After running around for a bit, I found this virus. It's pretty uncommon to find it in this area. EPM already talked about this one, I'm pretty sure, so just remember that it avoids your row until it attacks and then opens up a homing flame that turns once.



You don't have enough time to fire cannons and things like that, so a bit of a slow fight. Still, got the chip.

FireTower(BN1): E F L M T
FireTower(OSS): E F M T *

If I spent enough time, I could get an 8, and therefore have a shot at the * code. I won't do that yet, though.



I chuck this badboy in. Look at all those copies of stuff I have already.

That's what you get for grinding those GMDs for the Hammers. And yeah, FireTower is really, really good.



An asshole.

And an asshole.




It's been said that FireMan did this lots and lots of times, killing Navis left right and center who went to stop him. I wonder what his kill count is.



You think your shitty AI can beat me and UselessYeti over here?

Careful, Giver, if your ego gets any bigger someone might mistake it for a tumor.





...sez

...sez




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGerojxAFmQ

EZ.

You'll note the lack of 120 HP. This fight was recorded on a different save when I was testing something for the translators.

Also, you'll finally hear some of the voiceclips. inb4 Yeti snark.

Oh wow it's almost as irritating as reading your -

You utter prick.



Only 300 HP and 10/15 damage. Duh.





So, Match was just sent to random ovens to find a random program? Talk about a needle in a haystack situation.

Yeah, I still don't know why the FireProgram was in Lan's oven.

Why was the FireProgram in any oven at all?! Why wasn't it guarded at all?!



Dumb shit.

Villainy 105: The Art of the Monologue.



Good. Kill this dumb world.







I agree, angry pantsless duck. Why couldn't FireMan have at least set up some sort of firebomb before he left?



Get Baking Soda.




This game does human moments better than story logic. It should stick with that.

On the other hand, MMBN Story Logic delivered in the next game with Whiskey Guy so I think we can forgive a few minor flaws.




Don't worry, Lan. Not a lot of people understand it either!

Seriously, we needed a flowchart to figure some of this plot stuff out.




I like how they're saying this in front of their mother who isn't objecting to the notion of her son playing hero.





Leaving this in just to trigger Yeti.

I'm not triggered, just very, very disappointed.



Order pizza. Fuck. Now I want pizza. Brb.



Yeah because it's BUSTED.

<>



So, before you sleep, you can go outside and get some early items.

And most of them are pretty useful. Well, some of them.



Fuck that. I'M HUNGRY. Our oven is DEAD.



Feed me. This is hinting at something you should do later, which I think most of you remember. If not, you'll see it again.

(In an extremely nature documentary voice:) The wild Lan hunts for food, desperately intruding on anyone it can find in hopes that one of them will be generous enough to share. Unfortunately, it will be disappointed, and go to bed hungry tonight.



We must scourge for items, and find rare viruses!



So this comp actually leads to the Net. And we'll reopen that connection later. Fair tip: mystery datas also respawn in this game when you leave an HP like this, not only by jacking out.

Opening up connections is always useful, but not as much as in the other games. At least, for right now. We can do some ridiculous things with other peoples' comps later on.



Spookys in here. They drop Recov10 L instead of Recov10 G.



EZ.

Spookys are pretty easy, especially if you put that LilBomb in your folder.



We'll need this for a main quest in a bit.



Optional, but still kinda useful...ish. Mayl's HP doesn't help you progress in the game like Dex's.



First time you can meet Powies.



This lets us replace Minibombs, since Quakes deal a whopping 90 damage. And no, Quakes don't break in this re-release.

Sigh.

Which is weird, since they're a huge weight plunging down onto the enemy. It makes more sense for them to break things. Just another mark on the 'Why didn't they change this?' board, I guess.



Jack in to the ol' MegaMan Legends bot.

RIP MegaMan Legends 3, you were too good for this world.



Ah, it looks like the translators changed the way it was written to reflect Battle Network 5 and beyond.



Got another one, but in I code. You'll need 3 of these to complete a trade. I actually didn't grind for that trade...yet.




"Piss off you little monster."

Imagine if toys could talk. That'd be weird... Eh, the idea probably wouldn't go anywhere.

Yeah, if someone tried to make something that idea, I bet it would suck.



We're gonna head to Dex's now and th- OOH CARS.

Time to raid Dex's fridge, see if he's got any food for us.



Oh hey, a Gamecube. That takes me back.



You'll want to keep this, I guess. It has a Program Advance later. Yes, I'll be making the Encyclopedia this time. Ugh.



: DON'T SIT TOO CLOSE TO THE TV! WHEN PLAYING FOR A LONG TIME, BE SURE TO REST FOR AN HOUR!

No-one does this, go away Mister Prog.

Mister Prog is giving you good, helpful advice, you'd better listen to him.



There are Mettaur2's in here and if you get an average rank, you'll have a higher chance for scoring a Guard G, as opposed to Guard A from Mettaur 1. This is useful for a G-coded Program Advance, so maybe you'll want to acquire it.

Dex's house isn't really meant to be challenged until after the next scenario, if I'm being honest. That being said, this is a game for kids, so it's easy enough.



Yeesh. That Canodumb2 is uncommon in this area, not to mention the virus formation is something you'd have trouble with, unless you're packed full of Spreaders from the chip shop.



Nice. I'm not gonna put this in, actually. It's 80 damage, but I don't feel like getting multiple of these to make it worthwhile.



I will put in this, since it's A code and I'm already rocking Quakes anyway.



Spooky2 already!? Dang.

Another reason to believe that you shouldn't be here this early. Spooky2 has the most health out of any regular virus we've encountered. Hammer will still ruin its day, though.



Instead of Recov50 G, they drop Recov50 L and Recov80 L instead of Recov80 A.

But I want that A code.



Mine.

Longer period of time where you can't get hit is always better.




I made sure to get multiple Sonicwaves. That's 5 chips that deal damage down an entire row and hits for 80. Ouch.



You'll note that they reuse this map for Battle Network 2.

I mean, not everyone reformats their hard drive every few days. Or, would this be more along the lines of redoing their homepage?



Get this, you'll need it later.



The first 3 codes (ABC) are some of the better codes in the game. This is most likely not a coincidence.

This is in contrast to later games, where they basically throw S code at you.



GIMME YOUR SHIT YAI




You'll need this for a trade later on, so keep it.




GASP. STALKING PROGS.

The HORROR. These pure Progs, subjected to whatever inanities Yai chatters about on the phone!



Yai, you're being cheap.

Also, reminder that dungeons and comps have fixed, one-time rewards.

She's still rewarded you more than the entire Oven, though.



Found you, Swordy. Now gimme your chip.



There's no LifeSword PA in this game, unfortunately. It's called B-Sword and S-Sword instead. They just use Sword, WideSword, and LongSword separately while MegaMan stays invincible.

On the plus side, LongSword got a buff. It now deals 100 damage, aligning itself with its BN6 counterpart.

LongSword being 100 damage is really useful in getting double-deletes.




Bought 1 HP Memory and 2 PowerUps. We're really decking ourselves out early on.



I dumped my PowerUps all into Attack. My upgrade path is Attack-->Charge-->Rapid.

Since you can rapid-fire as fast as you press the button when up close, you can fire as often as you move, and honestly you shouldn't really need the buster all things considered, Rapid is only useful for dumping extra PowerUps.

I think that's enough for this update. Don't worry, the massive grind will begin soon.