Part 15: The Thing about L

Chapter 11 - The Thing about L

Oh crap. L is pissed at me and things have gotten bad. REAL bad.

A little backstory: Before this trip, L got a crazy idea: Skiing at night. I don't know if you guys have any ski experience, but it's generally a bad idea to ski when you can't see. I don't know if I was drunk, or just wanted to shut him up, or what, but I agreed to it at the time.

Anyway, I guess my cell is on the fritz, because I lost a bunch of numbers when I woke up tonight. I got most of them back, except for one: Thailand's. I awoke from a really weird dream (apparently I posted something in my sleep?) in the late evening, ran to Club Sanctuary and managed to get it again... and unsuccessfully tried for a little more than that...

Then it hit me! I was supposed to go night-skiing with L that night! I ran and got my equipment, and managed to get on the lift with him. He's sitting with me now, and he's pissed because I'm pretty late. Even worse, it just dawned on me that night-skiing is a really stupid idea and one of us can get hurt! Even even worse, there's something bothering L and if I can't convince him not to do it, he might get hurt!

I tried to explain that I was hitting on Thailand, but he still seemed pissed.

What do I do, Internet?!



L looks pretty menacing...



And then suddenly-



Ow! What the fuck was he thinking?



What should I say to him?



Feel better?



Oh, L! Always mixing up shit with Fight Club! AGAIN!



I was half-paying attention as I pondered whether or not Friends was the edgiest sit-com I'd ever seen.



The Lodge Burn-Out is giving lessons on dating advice AND punctuality?



Whatever line I delivered next, I'd do so soullessly.

You're the one who told me to go after her so just shut up!
It wasn't for me, D wanted her number!
Maybe I was late because something happened, L.

You're the one who told me to go after her so just shut up!

L pondered this, in a Zen-like state. Maybe I was getting through to him...





Shit, I guess not! How do I convince someone not to travel downhill on skis into a forest full of trees without being able to see?!



Guys, I'm really scared. I'm not so sure about this...

Let's do it!



Well... yes! I can't do it! I won't!



edit: Oh yeah, and:


Skiing down this hill, in this wind, in the dark... it just doesn't seem like such a good idea anymore.





For the record, just in case, if he decides to jump off the lift and ski this thing by himself, should I go after him?

Everyone posted:

Sprung avatars

...Did I tell everyone about the Save Brett foundation someone's starting up! For a mere $10, you can get a Sprung tote bag!

Because we're morons, you and I.



Oh my God... L was going to get himself killed! I started to cry a little.



I couldn't help it. I had to stop him, but how?




Go ahead. No one's stopping you.



!!!!



Fine. I decided to meet L back at the lodge. As I did, my mind went to the worst.




Oh God! What if that happened?!



Fortunately, he was fine at the bottom of the lift. He'd made it okay... BUT HE WANTED TO DO IT AGAIN! I got back on the lift in order to convince him not to do it a second time. What could I have said differently? Should I have gone down with him? (Probably not.) Called him a douchebag?

Nobody thinks you're a poseur.

Innominatus posted:

I am curious to see what would happen if you decided to follow Lucas down the hill...

I guess...




Followed by the same thing if I'd have went back to lodge. I suppose.

I don't know what to do, guys! All my suggestions will lead to him skiing at night!

You're not losing anyone!

And then he'd jump off the lift.

You'll meet someone of your own!

And then he'd jump off the lift.

L, are you even listening to what I'm saying or just responding randomly? I mean you're not losing us as friends to some chick.

And then he'd jump off the lift.

I think I'd better "start over", as it were.



 There's a few alternate solutions to this, so don't think I'm hinting that "Feel better?" wasn't a good choice or something. Also, there's not many spots to Use Item here, but I'll include it if there are. 

What the hell is your problem?
The first rule about Nightskiing- no wait, I said that already.
Yeah, you did. In fact, it seems like this is the exact same response you gave to "Feel better?" that I said earlier.
Yeah.
Well, I guess you might say something different later on based on that. It's happened before. Sigh.
Well, still. What did I say before? Oh yeah!



This time, I called him a douche-bag, and told him that:

Maybe I was late because something happened, L.
Save it for Dr. Phil.



Yeah, maybe a little too crazy.





I could also say "I'm solid," but that would lead to an earlier sequence of events. I couldn't let L go down that mountain (again) without finding out what was wrong with him.

Yeah... I'm not so solid about this one.




Before deciding though, I thought about using an Amorous Action.





I guess that doing that would end our friendship or something, so I added this "Game Over" overlay to the picture (the overlay came with my Blackberry strangely). I guess it was just a funny aside to do that to other guys, but with L, it wasn't funny.

This isn't the way to impress people!



...Not really.



We could go bowling!



Would nothing convince him?!



Also, I tried the Bronze Medal:



No dice.

They have those cool bumper lanes!




It's dark in there! Everything is painted neon and under blacklights!




You'll love it! I bet that chick [note: spelled right here, for some reason] Alex will be there!



AND THEN HE JUMPED OFF THE LIFT! He ended up skiing down again okay, and wanted to do it a third time. So we got back on the subject of bowling, but this time I said:

Come on, let's get out of here.



How did that follow from what I said?! Ugh! L made no sense!

Maxwell Adams posted:

Unlocking Social Anxiety

You have a lot of stuff. How do you fit it all into your pockets?

Sigh.

To satiate the fleeting, boastful pride of a non-poseur. Also, you're not a poseur. Did I mention that? Anyway, yeah, fleeting boastful pride.



To impress girls?
BINGO!
L, don't you think there's more to life than just impressing girls?



Eh? Didn't we have this exact same conversation earlier?

No one thinks you're a poseur.
Don't lie to me, man. I'm the lodge burn-out, you said it yourself! And now I'm losing my friends to chicks. This sucks.
I'm sure you'll meet someone.
I don't want to meet someone. I want my friend back!

It looked like he was going to jump YET AGAIN, so this time, I tried redoing the conversation only saying that he wasn't a poseur earlier on.



Oddly, and for the first time in the entire vacation - it seemed like something I did much earlier actually had consequence.



This led back (for the love of God) to the "Why are we doing this?" part, but for God knows what reason, it would lead to different results.

To impress girls?
BINGO!
But dude... there's nobody here.
Good point...



And then:



So I had to follow him this time...



We both made it safely! (Really!)





L, I can't take this.





Of course, I couldn't help but say:



Hey!
Ow!



So I made another Photoshop:



Hey weird - I got a crazy e-mail:

Weird E-Mail posted:

Re: Slowbeef, what the fuck happened in that scene?

I think we broke Sprung. You're supposed to have a conversation where Lucas admits he's still a virgin. You reply that no one cares about that stuff. Lucas points out that Danny's not a virgin, enabling you to get the Golden Line: "I don't think his cousin counts, dude." And then telling Lucas that Danny's girlfriend doesn't actually exist.

And even though you're told the point of the stage is not to let Lucas ski, if you guys talk about it, you can ski it and complete the stage like we did. (Apparently, you can convince him not to.)

Unfortunately, we apparently called Lucas a poseur back in stage 2 (we did?) which meant the GameFAQs walkthrough didn't apply to us. His response to "No one thinks you're a poseur" was supposed to trigger: "Can I tell you something?" Instead, it triggered "You called me a poseur back at the lodge in front of Danny!" which changed the entire course of the conversation. I played through like five times and couldn't find any way to get either the Golden Line...

...or for the conversation to really have any context to make any sense in that scenario.

I'm sorry this stage ended up being such a confusing trainwreck - I've honestly not seen that before.