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Warcraft: Orcs & Humans

by Azzur

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Original Thread: The pale dogs approach! - Let's Play Warcraft: Orcs & Humans!



Warcraft! One of the most recognizable names in video games, thanks to the success of World of Warcraft. It should come as no surprise that the original Warcraft is just as stellar, correct?

Well, yes and no. At the time, Warcraft was an amazing game. It expanded on a few of the RTS innovations: interesting mission structure, UI enhancements, and multiplayer. However, all of these innovations are a good step backwards from what we know and expect from our average RTS game these days. That should pretty much be self-explanatory. Warcraft actually features a number of elements that are pretty frustrating. I'll go into these more as the LP progresses, but for the moment, let's talk more about what this thread will be like.

What kind of LP will this be?
Contrary to common logic, this will not be a Video LP, but rather a screenshot one. You see, Warcraft's gameplay is amazingly dry, and watching a video of peons traveling across the map to reach a gold mine is not all that interesting. Combat is slow, thanks to the ability to only select four units at a time, and being unable to assign groups.

As well, the LP will be narrated by Nigel Necksmasher, the amateur chieftain who is in charge of the assault on Azeroth. He'll have some time in the spotlight via illustration and hopefully add a bit of flavor.

Will we be seeing any lore or history here? Or shall we shit on canon?
Okay, jokes aside about the Warcraft lore, yes, there will be all sorts of lore tidbits throughout the LP. As well, I will do my best to make sure that this thread stays as close to canon as feasibly possible. Storyline elements are rather difficult with Warcraft because... well, there was no real script for the game. The story and missions were literally improvised on the spot at the recording studio. Nonetheless, this stage of history has since be retconned to hell and back, so I'll try and touch on everything.

How often will we be seeing updates?
Although it's always difficult to say exactly when the thread will update, but I will work diligently to keep to a once a week schedule of updates. If something keeps me from updating that week (time constraints, emergency, great porn), I'll have prepared a "mini-update" that delves a bit into the lore or characters of Nigel and the like. Most often these updates will be in the form of my illustrations.

Is this just the orcs? Are we going to see any human action?
Well, the main updates will be dealing with just the orc campaign. However, that's not to say that we won't be seeing some of the human campaign through some of the mini-updates. If there's enough of an uproar for a human run-through, I may be able to put something together. However, there is a canonical reason for why I'm going through the orc campaign.

These drawings suck!
No argument there.

You're trying to be canon? Where's Doomhammer?
Never heard of him.

Now, to jump right into things: the Introduction to Warcraft: Orcs & Humans., Viddler, or Youtube

And a helpful map, straight from the Warcraft manual.

And if you're so inclined, you can download the manual here as well as the in-game music here! (Thanks to shinvitya and apgsoft for the music)

Act 0: Blackhand needs you!
Act 1: Building with mud and twigs
Act 2: Good, mindless fun
Intermission: What the hell are those humans doing?
Act 3: To make a Halmet, you have to crack a few skulls
Act 4: The Common Sense Book of Orc Child Care
Act 5: Tying up loose ends
Intermission: The best laid plans of orcs... always end in bloodshed
Act 6: Wait, which way does this map go?
Act 7 (part one): The Showdown
Act 7 (part two): The Showdown
Act 8: What the hell are you all doing down here?
Act 9: Between a rock and a death wagon
Act 10: Screw this, kill 'em
Act 11: Golden Fiddlers
Act 12: The Grand Finale

Burning Legion, Medivh, and you!
Who is this Blackhand guy?
Grand Hamlet and Karazhan; Medivh throws a party!
You mean, ogres aren't native to Azeroth?
Who's ass are we kicking? (Part 1)
Who's ass are we kicking? (Part 2)
It's always sunny in Sunnyglade
"If I Did It" By Ogrim Doomhammer
Identity Crisis
Saturday Night Recap
What the hell, dwarves?
The Final Countdown

Medals handed out...
The Loremaster medal...
: Given to Walrus Pete

Medal of Surprising Detail...
: Given to Bloodly

Helm of Orc-y-ness...
: Given to ScotchDK

Mayhem Medal of Massive Monetary Machination...
: Given to Popeston

The Copper Pencil of Peons...
: Given to Popeston

Raiders Pencils of Power...
: Given to Voxx

Warchief's Golden Pencils of Elemental Onslaught...
: Given to Zak2k12

Medal of Model Mastery...
: Given to Screaming Idiot

Map Madman Medal...
: Given to Ulvirich

The peon, your basic worker unit. Used to gather the two resources: lumber and gold. As well, peons are able to build and repair buildings, which make them a must have for any Chieftain. The peon, however, is a complete coward, and cannot attack.

HP: 40
COST: 400 gold

The grunt. Well, the name says it all, really; the grunt is your basic melee unit. They move slowly, hit slowly (albeit decently), and can take a few hits. Unfortunately for the grunt, they quickly become obsolete, useful only when you can't get the gold together for a better unit. Not that they don't have their place, however.

HP: 60
RANGE: Melee
COST: 400 gold

Spearmen, a gift from the heavens. Your basic, and practically only, ranged unit. Low hp, low armor, and decent damage. Very speedy, and can outrun most opponents, which makes they useful in many situations. Can't really stand toe-to-toe with the melee types.

HP: 60
COST: 450 gold, 50 lumber

The necrolytes are your supportive casters. They have a number of spells that bolster your forces indirectly, rather than overtly changing the battlefield. They're mostly known for their ability to raise the dead.

HP: 40
COST: 700 gold

Warlocks are the more offensive end of magic. But don't let the name fool you, Warlocks are much less fireball-slinging badasses, and more of the sit back and summon help variety. That doesn't mean that a warlock can't get up in close combat and mix it up, but it just isn't advisable.

HP: 40
COST: 900 gold

Raiders are the backbone of the orcish army: strong, fast, and durable. However, they are quite expensive, which is the only real drawback to them. Raiders are great in nearly every situation: primary attacks, skirmishers, flankers, and taking care of siege weapons.

HP: 90
RANGE: Melee
COST: 850 gold

You can't have war without siege weaponry, and nothing says siege weapon like the catapult. As you can guess, the catapult has amazingly high damage, balanced with amazingly low speed. However, these powerful little wrecking balls can be just as disastrous to your own troops as well as the opponent's. Don't forget, these suckers have splash!

HP: 120
COST: 900 gold, 200 lumber



RAISE DEAD: The most common necrolyte spell that raises a nearby skeleton to fight for you. This can be enemy or ally, and can turn a fight in a pinch.

DARK VISION: A simple spell that reveals a very small area anywhere on the map. Pretty much useless late in the game, since it has a high cost to research and reveals so very little. However, in a long game, this can help turn the tide to give you an informational advantage.

UNHOLY ARMOR: To counter the ever-annoying invisibility spell that the humans have, the orcs have unholy armor. This spells make a unit completely invulnerable for a period of time. However, such power comes at a cost: Half of the unit's current HP. Now on a single unit, this may not seem like much, but imagine if you will... an army of unkillable death machines.


MINOR SUMMONING: The basic warlock spell that gives you 1 to 3 spiders that go around harassing enemies and scouting out land. Useful in confined spaces where their numbers can bar passage and hold choke points for ranged units.

POISON CLOUD: Besides looking awesome, poison cloud is great for taking out large swaths of troops. Area of effect destruction of units and can help cover your catapults in case of an incoming assault.

More spells forthcoming...

Skeletons are rickety bones that can add to your fight slightly, but mainly exist as a number against the opponent. These are the fallen soldiers that are risen up by the necrolytes to carry out their mundane tasks in undeath.

HP: 40
RANGE: Melee

Spiders are your general little helpful buggers that are all around awesome. In straight up combat, they're pretty weak (even weaker than the skeleton), but they usually gang up on one target and can take it down pretty quickly. They also make excellent scouts and road blocks.

HP: 30
RANGE: Melee.
COST: A fully charged Warlock can summon up to five spiders.

Voices and Cheating videos!, Viddler, or Youtube

Blackhand Fun Bucks by Popeston

Blackhand's shopping orders by... who else? Popeston!

Nigel and the gang by Screaming Idiot (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7)

Popeston's .GIFs!

CONTEST: CLOSED Winner: Zak2k12
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