IntroductionWelcome to Dungeon Keeper.
Dungeon Keeper was an RTS dragged forth from the (then) brilliant mind of Peter Molyneux, and his creative team, back in the days of yore (1997).
It's a game of dark humour, and fiendish strategy. In its unpatched state, it's something of a joke, but the patched version, (or DKGold) was a hard game to play against.
Of note, while not completely serious, I did decide, in regards to writing this, to write it as the advisor to the keeper. While I do include pre and post battle descriptions of the area, it is 100% better to actually listen to it. Fantastically hilarious.
One thing I would like to request, if someone is able to help me (google completely failed me on this). You'll notice that when I get a new creature, I introduce it with a small avatar, speaking a little bit about each creature, I would like to do the same thing for heroes, but for the life of me, cannot find a single one online. If anyone would be able to find them / get them for me (been searching for a few days now) I'd be much appreciated.
In this game, you play the ubiquitous Dungeon Keeper, a fiendish overlord with designs on the Land of Skybird Trill, you'll recruit many creatures, from the tiny chain-smoking Imp, to the massive girth of the Bile Demon, from the Claws of the Dark Mistress to the Calved Hooves of the Horned Reaper.
Let me spin you a tale.
Table of Contents
- Chapter 1
- Chapter 2
- Chapter 3
- Chapter 4
- Chapter 5
- Chapter 6
- Chapter 7
- Chapter 8
- Chapter 9
- Chapter 10
- Chapter 11
- Chapter 12
- Chapter 13
- Chapter 14
- Chapter 15
- Chapter 16
- Chapter 17
- Chapter 18
- Chapter 19
- Chapter 20
- Chapter 21
- Chapter 22
- Chapter 23
Opening and Closing Lines
Set in the realm of joy, the people of Eversmile are plagued only by aching facial muscles, and not anthrax as we
had hoped. Eversmile is a disgusting land of good humour and polite frivolity.
Brana-Hawk, war and anthrax have taken to this land likes fleas to a rat. The region is, thanks to your unstinting
efforts, now a major eyesore.
A hideous sham of a town, in which the prosperous citizens have no gripes or moans. Sadly, even the children are
happy and secure. This is because they aren't punished for non-existant crimes..
Darkhana, the surviving citizens have more on their plates than a demon-spawn with three dead adventurers to
munch. Not that many citizens have survived, as such.
Map 3WaterDream Warm
A region of pointless frolicking and endless pleasure. No one here understands the true meaning of suffering and
RANDOM SHOCKING VIOLENCE METED OUT ARBITRARILY.
This place now has a proper name because of what you did here, there is a healthy disrespect for life, and you'll
be amused to hear that cannibalism has gained a strong foothold amongst the ragged inhabitants.
Polite bartering has lead to extreme compassion and a sense of contentment in this area. Not even a thick skinned
troll could survive the understanding and help these scummy people could provide.
There's a burning mess where once a pretty village stood. truely you've achieved a significant improvement in the
area, even the poisonous smoke smells sweet.
Map 5Lushmeadow on down
The bloody axes of war and famine have so far bypassed this quiet backwater, leaving the inhabitants totally
unaware of the purpose of real agony and loss. Unbearably most die of old age.
The streets run with the blood of the slain. Screams of pain and the howls of anguish rip the night air like a
vengeful siren song. This really is somewhere you can take the kids for a weekend.
The folk of snugglebell worship the common rabbit. Floppy eared bunnies are encouraged to hop around the fields
surrounding the hamlet, bringing happiness, love, and more bunnies to the entire area.
Not a soul stirs here now, even the rats are afraid to come out of the drains and feast on the dead. You really
outdid yourself here master, it's a shame the destruction was so easy.
This region of dreaming underlings is ruled by the Lady Catherine. She is kind, and fair, and doesn't imprison or
torture her subjects, for some reason.
Everyone has been put to the sword, and we've made an enormous magic carpet out of the thousand bunnies that
swarmed here. Your minions will feast on their tiny remains for weeks. Truely a majestic victory.
Blissfully unaware of the damage protracted war can wreak on their idyllic cluster of homesteads, the villagers of
Tickle are pure of heart, and unblemished of face and neck.
Panic Intrisica. A weeping, wizened crone presides over this ruined empty land now. Once she was beautiful.
Now she'd make you want to vomit. The improvement is impressive.
Map 9Moonbrush Wood
A forest town with a welcoming population. Demons and the legions of Hell could ride in, and would probably be
offered cheap lodgings and a night of good cheer in a warm cozy tavern.
Once a flourishing homestead, now it's a stinking hole in the ground. It will be years before even the hardiest
weed grows here again. War, on the other hand, is in full blossom.
Unable to see the bad side of anyone, these folk could benefit from a swinging sword to the back of the neck, or
possibly a lightning spell to the throat. Such possibilities never cross their happy minds.
The legions of Hell have been through here at your bidding. They've altered the appearance of the place as you
would wish Master. Now we breath the heavy perfume of toxins wherever we wander.
Family life is the reason these serfs feel so confident and cheerful. Their unruffled existence would make even a
terror dog throw up it's breakfast of half-chewed champions.
A Kingdom fit for a Dungeon Keeper of your standards, Sire. The Blackened Hulks of the houses welcome you, and
the overgrounders prostrate themselves, Mainly because we've killed them...
Map 12Elf's Dance
A village set inside a giant fairy ring. A weak kind of magic provides the dwellers with all their hearts could
desire. Embarrassingly, most simply wish for peace, happiness, and a long untroubled life.
We've set fire to this place. It's still burning with a fierce unnatural intensity, but we're sure you'll love it
once it's cooled down a bit..
Map 13Buffy Oak
A small location, where the people just sit around all day and enjoy each other's company. They talk, laugh, and
sing without ever arguing, drawing daggers, and dying in a gurgling rush of blood. A truly bizarre place.
Carn Forge. The Fairy ring lies smashed, and the folk have fled to the hills. Our vampires are out hunting them
down as we speak. Rest assured, we'll be dragging them back soon, my lord.
A settlement in the fertile farmland near the mountain. Nothing ever happens here, apart from some good deeds and
the odd exchange of kind-hearted greetings. A disgusting pit of Hades in other words.
The people enjoyed each other's company so much. that they'll be together forever now. We've thrown them all into
a big pit and piled tons of rock on top of them. A fitting end, We'll trust you'll agree.
Map 15Woodly Rhyme
A place of such obscene contentment, it's criminal that a horde of undead vigilantes haven't massacred every soul
in the place. If there's any justice, that will soon happen, my lord.
We've developed this area. It is now a breeding ground for our legions of beetles and flies. To think that it was
once pointless farmland providing food for the weak population that lived there in so-called peace..
Flowers are on display in every building in this area. The poisonous stink of these feted blooms will stick in the
throats and noses of every right-thinking villains that comes within four leagues of the place.
Vampires have sucked the life out of everyone here. They poisoned the well, and smeared dung on all the door
handles as a joke. Not a sophisticated sense of humor these undead bloodsuckers...
Industrious citizens go about their daily lives with care, enthusiasm, and diligence. There is no crime, and
everyone works for the common good. It's a disaster of a place and deserves razing.
The flowers lie trampled in the dirt, and their disgusting pong has been replaced by the smell of soiled armor,
and the internal juices of those sliced to pieces by your servants, master. Quite an improvement, I trust you'll agree.
Map 18Blaise End
A place of joy and love. Nothing, the legends say, has ever spoiled the calm of Blaise End. So, when something
does, it will be long overdue, and the inhabitants will thoroughly deserved it.
Nothing is left of this settlement apart from a stubborn stain on the ground. Our trolls are hard at work erasing
it at this very moment. Then we'll spray acid over the entire locale.
Light and Airy. Mistle is a haven for those that love the peaceful countryside. The sort of people that won't like
miles of sulfurous stinking wasteland. And the screams of the damned, of course.
DarkSword. A great battle was won here. A bit one-sided, granted. Our Minions fought valiantly, and now the day
is ours. The survivors have been dealt with. Properly.
Map 20Skybird Trill
The Ultimate in cute. A frown in Skybird Trill brings all the townspeople to the sufferer's door with gifts of
love, fine cheer, and eternal friendship. A place where nothing can ever go wrong. Or so they fondly believe.
The world of Skybird Trill is nothing more the charred wreck of a ruined nightmare. You've won a furious vital
victory, and you are ruler supreme over the whole world! What next Master?
Windows Compatibility Notes
Yes, this is a known problem. By setting the compability to Windows 95 it should solve so you can actually start
playing, though I woulden't reccommend it as it can make your mouse very choppy/lag in-game.
But I found out how to solve this too. You need "Windows Applications compatibility Tools", I am using version
4.1. It is free to download from Micro$oft, so if you google for it like I did you won't have any problem finding it.
Before you start be sure you don't have changed anything on your *.exe file, such as set the compability to
windows 95, if so change it back.
Now install the tool from Micro$oft and start by using "Compatadmin.exe"
1. Click on the "new" tab to make a new database, name it dungeon keeper 1
2. Right click on your new database and choose Create new -> Application fix...
3. Write Dungeon Keeper 1 for name of the program, Bullfrog for the vendor and then click the Browse button to
find your dungeon keeper exe file such as "keepd3d.exe" or "Keeper95.exe". Then click next.
4. Choose "none" on the left list and click next.
5. You should have "EmulateHeap" turned on in this list, that is what you need to actually start the levels. You
can also turn on "EmulateSlowCPU" although I have yet to see if this actually helps for something. Then click next and finish.
6. Save your database somewhere and then click on the "file" tab and choose "install"
It should now work fine.
P.S. If those that are interested knowing what actually make the mouse laggy it is when you set the compability to
windows 95, then it turns on 57 compability things, one is "EmulateHeap", and that is why you can start the game, but it also turns on "DisableBoostThread" which is the source why your mouse is laggy, the other 55 things I
am not sure about what they do.
It should also be possible to turn off Hyperthreading in the list, but alas I have forgotten what it is called. So
if anyone know please write it here, I have used it for Grim Fandango where Hyperthreading causes crashes.
Anyway, hope this helps and good luck.