Hello and welcome to Awful Fantasy 3, a FF6 romhack developed by a group of terrible goons nearly a decade ago.
This link explains it much better than I ever will, but since no one clicks links anymore here's a quote.
I started this one fine day, fall of 2001. I had been playing Skyblade's FF3 Spoof, and I thought to myself "I can do better". So I began, and everyday I worked, I worked, I worked. It caused me to go insane, be kidnapped by a magazine cult, my parents got divorced, and I spent time in jail, ALL FOR THIS GAME.
And now it's finished.
Is it bugged? Yes. It's not perfect. But it works. It does what it's supposed to, and now I'm done with it. Oh yes.
If you are offended or angered by a certain feature, let's look at who is responsible for this crap.
Team Everlasting Discomfort
GeekTheMage - Some dialogue, some sprites, made the damn thing work again.
Kyro Cilliani - Drew the original Hamburglar sprite, named items, calls me names.
Delpino - Gave me 50 bucks because I got him laid.
Brian - Magic names.
Fiwer - I'm not sure what the fuck he did.
BDA7DD - Hosts the site, accuses me of bad grammar.
the SA Goons - Contributed to naming the monsters, various quotes were "borrowed" from them.
Lacool - Consultation, some sprites.
the beta testers - I don't think they did anything either.
X JAKK - Everything else.
Nothing makes sense in this game and that's the way its meant to be. That said, the game is a fascinating idea of a goon project brought forth to completion, bugs be damned. While I've only been a goon for a few years (and, for the record, I goddamn hate that term and will never use it again in this thread if I can help it), there are plenty of out-of-date references to your fellow forum-goers from ages past.
That all being said, here's how this thread is going to go down.
Guidelines for this awful thread:
1. Spoil FF6 as much as you goddamn want. I'd prefer you not spoil Awful Fantasy but even if you do it won't make much sense anyways. Just spoiler it and be a dear if you would, please.
2. Most of the humor in this game (or lack thereof) speaks for itself, so I'm not going to be as chatty as I've been in threads past. There's usually not much I can add beyond "Heh, yeah" and "Did you check out what that dude just said". I'm pretty much just the guide here, who will explain interesting things as they come along. I understand the plot less then most, and I've beaten the damned thing. This is NOT an informative guide on how to play the game. I highly suggest you check out one of the other fantastic FF3/FF6 threads floating around the archives right now, because they'll be more useful than I will.
3. If you have any ideas on how to make this LP better, feel free to speak your mind! If it's not too stupid or pedantic I'll probably implement it. I'm not offended unless you call me a cockgobbler for no reason.
4. I may or may not blatently steal transcriptions from Syrg's thread from several years ago. You'll never take me alive.
5. I can't promise how quick I'll be about updating. Back in the glory days, I used to get out an update a day, but I've increased my offspring by 100% since then and am in college again, so who knows? This does, however, lead into...
If you've seen me around for a while, you're well aware that I close more threads than I finish. I'm tired of being that guy who quits. Therefore, I'm toxxing myself this time.
If I close this thread permanently, I wish to be probated for one month for being such an awful chode.
If I close the thread permanently without giving any reason for it, I request to be banned as well.
I'm sorry for everything you're about to see.
Table of Contents
- - Chapter One
- - Chapter Two
- - Chapter Three
- - Chapter Four
- - Chapter Five
- - Chapter Six
- - Chapter Seven
- - Chapter Eight
- - Chapter Nine
- - Chapter Ten
- - Chapter Eleven
- - Chapter Twelve
- - Chapter Thirteen
- - Bonus Chapter: Opera
- - Chapter Fourteen
- - Chapter Fifteen
- - Chapter Sixteen
- - Chapter Seventeen
- - Chapter Eighteen
- - Chapter Nineteen
- - Chapter Twenty
- - Chapter Twenty-One
- - Chapter Twenty-Two
- - Chapter Twenty-Three
- - Chapter Twenty-Four
- - Chapter Twenty-Five
- - Chapter Twenty-Six
- - Chapter Twenty-Seven
- - Bonus Chapter: Isnoop's Dreams
- - Chapter Twenty-Eight
WORLD OF BALANCE
WORLD OF RUIN
Slowbeef gave the word so here you go! Smash this into your favorite emulator and you too can wonder what the fuck you're doing with your life.